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December 1, 2021

Sometimes we learn who we want to be, by being who we don’t want to be

Sometimes we learn who we want to be, by being who we don’t want to be.

Since I entered the coaching world, the biggest failure I have faced is when I have realised in retrospect that I haven’t been the person I want to be.

It’s painful, but sometimes we have to learn the lesson the hard way.

I sent out emails that were pushy and manipulative when I first started my coaching business. And now I know that’s not who I want to be.

I delved into the world of weight loss because I wanted a successful business and I was in a rush to find a niche that “worked”. And now I know that’s not who I want to be.

I taught concepts that are very simplistic and lack nuance, I demonstrated leadership in a very masculine way to cover up my own insecurities to try and belong. And now I know that’s not who I want to be.

I stayed in programs where at times I felt unsafe. I didn’t say anything and I didn’t leave. And now I know that’s not who I want to be.

I want to remind us all to find compassion for the times that we have been the person we don’t want to be, so we can do better. When we can shine a gentle light on our failure to be who we want to be, we can also muster the courage to correct those wrongs.

In the process of being who I don’t want to be, I acted out of integrity.

If you feel like I have negatively impacted you in the past, if you believe I did not deliver or if I caused you harm in any way, I am sorry. Please tell me and I will listen. I’m not perfect. My past isn’t perfect. I’m human just like you. I’m doing my best and I’m committed to doing better.