They said no.
I made a public declaration of my application to a coaching retreat in Portugal with my teacher Brooke Castillo and one of her Master Coaches Kara Loewentheil.
In case you didn’t already know… I was rejected!
Cue feelings of failure, rejection and disappointment (OK maybe a little shame too if I am being honest).
As the year comes to a close, I’m taking stock of all the things I am proud of, but you know what else I am taking stock of? My failures too.
Have you ever heard of this saying… “Success is made on a pile of failures.” Let me show you how this is true.
I didn’t become a Master Coach.
I didn’t meet my business goals.
I didn’t take care of me enough in the first half of 2019 and had health issues later in the year.
And I didn’t get accepted to the 2020 Portugal retreat.
When I look at that list, I could hide in shame and make it mean that I wasn’t meant to achieve these things. This is what I used to do. But I now know there is an alternative. I can accept the feelings of failure, rejection and disappointment. I can process those feelings because they are JUST feelings. Instead of hiding in shame and giving up, I can take responsibility for them (which is different from blame). And then I can get curious.
Why did I fail? What do I want to achieve and why? What can I learn from this? What can I do better?
If I believe wholeheartedly (which I do) that I am becoming a Master Coach then I can use this information to decide how to keep going and reach this goal. I can see the beliefs that were preventing me from achieving this. I can see what actions were not effective. I can try something different. When I believe that I will reach my goal, I keep taking action. (In fact I am working on believing I AM a Master Coach and it feels so close I can taste it!)
If I believe that my business goals are happening, they just didn’t happen yet, I figure out new innovative and fun ways to make them happen.
I know that my health is more important than anything else I do, because without my health I can’t show up for me, let alone anyone else in my life that I love. So I make my health a priority (and now I know better what NOT to do).
My curious approach uncovered the reason I wanted so badly to go to the Portugal retreat. I wanted to expand. I now realise there are soooo many ways for me to start doing that RIGHT NOW!
Can you see how success is made on a pile of failures? It’s what I help my weight loss clients do. We can use it in all areas of our lives.
If you are pondering the past year, spare some time to ponder on what you DIDN’T achieve, so you can learn from it and do it even better in 2020!
Here’s to an incredible 2020! ?
Image by Carly Robinson