Dear courageous mum of a young child/children,
Have you had several glorious and gruelling years as a SAHM with your precious children?
Have the bleary eyed days and nights where sleep was a forgotten memory of yesteryear?
Now you get most of the night to sleep and the time before sleep you desperately fill with forgotten pleasures like chocolate binging and a deep glass of red wine? Have your adorable babies toddled and grown into children?
When your babies become toddlers and then they become children and go off to preschool/school, suddenly you have a minute to focus on you. You might be confused, unsure, excited and daunted at the prospect of this new stage in your life. The life before children, your professional life is now a distant memory and perhaps you are yearning for some of those feelings that success in work life brought but you are not sure exactly what or how to make that transition. I am guessing that you are considering that past career and the past position that you held and even though you might be hoping for more – more money, more flexibility, more challenge. Feelings of self doubt may be creeping in. You may even feel scared. I was that person, I was that mum. I ended up in almost the exact same role that I was in 10 years ago. I was working at a local council in a part time community development role in the multicultural sector. I loved that job but I wanted MORE. I wanted more flexibility, I wanted to be worth a better wage but I didn’t know how to get it. I didn’t have more professional experience. Actually now I was worse off, I had a 4 year gap in my resume. And somehow, even though I had more time to myself and more sleep, I didn’t feel like I had more energy.
Honestly, you aren’t crazy, your not broken, your brain is working exactly as it should. Your brain is in survival mode. It’s doing what it knows best. It’s doing what kept our species alive.
The motivational triad. 1. Seek pleasure. 2. Avoid pain. 3. Do as little as possible. When you were younger you were able to look to the future, you wanted to build your career, then find the perfect mate and settle down, have children and own a house. Are you nodding? Is this you? A seemingly perfect life and yet you feel like something is not what it could be. I get it! So, is there a solution? Absolutely, but you have to have the courage to take that step and do the work. Are you ready?
Image by Derek Thompson, Unsplash