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May 11, 2018

How Not to Be a People Pleaser
Do you identify as a people pleaser? Do you find yourself making decisions because you are afraid of what other people might think?
People pleasers believe they being kind but they are not being kind to themselves.
People pleasers don’t tell the truth.
People pleasers hold themselves back in fear of what other people might think.
People pleasers often are so busy pleasing others they end up losing the ability to know what they want.
How do I know? Because I was a people pleaser.
I want to help you out here. I want you to see the effects of people pleasing.
You don’t get to be the real you.
People don’t get to know the real you.
The people in your life are liking a version of you that is not even really you.
You end up doing things because you think it’s what others would want. But you don’t even know what other people even want most of the time. You just keep trying to please at the expense of your time, your energy, your personal results and you being authentically you.
You end up feeling resentful.
And possibly acting a bit crazy. (I’ve been there.)
So now you get to decide.
Do you want to be a people pleaser?
If not, you can make decisions based on what you truly want.
If not, you can learn how to say no, from a place of love.
If not, you can stop lying.
If not you can surround yourself with people who love you for being you.
If not, you can step into being authentically you.
It can feel scary, but you can totally do hard things. You got this mama!
I just want to say that when we make decisions from an empowered place, rather than a place of fear, we can still decide that we will attend that social event with our partner, even though it’s not our favourite thing, because we love him and we know that will make him happy. But the difference is we are not afraid of what will happen if we don’t please that person. We are empowered to know that we could say no but we decide to say yes from a place of love. Can you see the difference? It’s a shift in mindset and it’s a magical one.
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Image by Verity Sanders, Unsplash