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January 4, 2018

Why do We Feel Compelled to Criticise?
I am a viking.
I admit it. Vikings are what Brene Brown (a shame expert) calls people who criticise others.
I’ve done it for years and I never knew why. I thought it made me feel powerful and strong, but it never really made me feel better.
Now I am aware of it, I realise it actually made me feel worse.
I now know why I did it.
Because I didn’t feel good enough. I didn’t notice this part. Because it was a belief. And a belief is a thought that you have thought so many times that it has become automatic and you don’t even notice it’s there. You just think it’s a truth.
So the next time you think something critical about another person, notice it. And know that the reason your brain does that, is because if you can’t be truly great, if you can’t reach perfection or the place you are striving for, at least you can convince yourself that you are better than the people around you.
But there is another alternative, to practice new thoughts so that your belief changes from “I am not enough”, to “I am enough” and then to “I am amazing”. And how, you might ask, do you practice a thought? Write it down, read it, think it, say it aloud. Start with a thought you truly believe. I put them on sticky notes in a book and practise the thoughts that I consciously want to be thinking. Try it. It might change your world!
If you like this kind of work, make sure you follow me on Instagram. I am taking advantage of the video feature in stories and I’m teaching new concepts all the time.
Image by Jason Rosewell.